Boston, You’re My Home

The tragic events of Patriot’s Day at the Boston Marathon have hit home for so many people. It was an act of terrorism, and of cowardice, directed at innocent civilians at a celebratory event. I don’t know if it is hitting me so hard because I used to live in New England for 11 years and have always had family and friends there as long as I can remember, if it is because I am a runner (albeit a slow one, but I do it), or if it is because of the continuing stream of shock and awe we are exposed to these days.

I remember exactly where I was on September 11th. Sitting at home in my room on my day off, I was in a Yahoo trivia chatroom and someone announced the news of the first plane hitting the World Trade Center. I turned the tv on just in time to see the second plane hit. For me, this was a jarring occurrence. Yes, I was in high school and remember too well the bombing in Oklahoma City, but this was different. New York City to us and often to the world acts as a symbolic home for our country. They hit us where it hurt more than ever before. This is not to dismiss Pearl Harbor, or OKC, or any other previous tragedies, but only to say this was in a place where more people travel and live on a daily basis and more people know.

For whatever reason, I feel even more connected to the attack on the Boston Marathon. It could be because I didn’t really know anyone immediately impacted by 9/11 at the time it happened. Not so much with Boston. I know literally dozens upon dozens of former classmates from elementary, middle, high school and college who live in and around the city. Newer friends in the Disney community, as well as friends from here in Florida currently attending college in Boston. This was a place where I traveled often to during my formative years.

I used to live about 20 minutes outside of Boston in Wellesley and would hop on the green line of the T and head into the city to explore the Aquarium, Children’s Museum, Science Musuem, Museum of Fine Arts, catch a Red Sox game, go to Fanueil Hall to go shopping. The cultural experiences, the food and the people of Boston are fantastic. I miss having that richness at my fingertips and someone tried to shatter the innocence of my memories of childhood yesterday. I had friends who were across the street from the second explosion only a couple hours before and decided to move a mile away. Another friend who had previously competed was running late with his family and didn’t make it to cheer. Other friends were nearby, but thankfully escaped the horror.

I can only imagine the 8 year old boy who was killed in the attack as he watched his dad cross the finish line just minutes before. The training and preparation that goes into running, even just 5Ks, is a commitment of body, mind and soul. To come so close to accomplishing for many a lifelong dream by finishing the Boston Marathon and to have that hard work destroyed by a villainous act is disgusting.

Having only been a “runner” for the past three years, I know the ups and downs of race preparations, cheering, travel and that amazing feeling of setting a goal and reaching it. My goal to start out was simple, to run a 5K two years after I had major knee surgery. With the encouragement of friends on twitter and facebook, I attained that first medal (okay, made of rubbery plastic, but still) in October of 2010. I didn’t die. I finished upright and under my own power, my only two goals for that first race. In 2011, I decided I would do all of the 5Ks that Walt Disney World had to offer, and I did that too, even a couple not knowing I had bronchitis at the time. 2012 I slacked off a bit, only completing on race in May.

This year is going to be different. I already did one 5K in February, but this is the year I am going to step it up and out of my comfort zone. Do I think I will ever run a marathon? I don’t know. I never had a desire to before the events of this week. Am I going to do my best to continue to improve to honor all of those runners out there who weren’t able to finish? You bet you ass I am! I have already signed up for my first 10K, Beach2Beacon, one of the largest races in New England behind the Boston Marathon. It seems only fitting. In January, I am also registered for the inaugural Walt Disney World 10K during marathon weekend.

The bastards who did this will not keep us from participating in races. If nothing else, they will motivate even more of us to get out there and to run and cheer in spite of their actions. We are a strong and resilient nation of people who will come together to support each other through our darkest moments and we will come out even tougher despite this.

I’m sure I will probably cram some other races in there too, and eventually would like to complete the Princess Half Marathon at WDW in February, but we will see if 2014 is that year. There are a lot of miles down the road, and each one of them will be dedicated to Boston, all the runners out there, and in the continued American spirit to not let these terrorists, whether foreign grown or domestic keep us down. We will always keep moving forward! I hope you all will keep those affected by this directly and indirectly in your thoughts and will do what you can to help by either giving blood regularly, donating to the Red Cross, or even signing up for a charity race. Do good to show the bad guys out there they will never win!

Mickey’s Halloween 5K 2010

Buzz and Woody’s Best Friends 5K 2011

Royal Family 5K 2011

ESPN the Weekend 5K 2011

Expedition Everest Challenge 2011

Mickey’s Halloween 5K 2011

Expedition Everest Challenge 2012

Royal Family 5K 2013

Medals

Keep Moving Forward

By the way, I’m wanting to start a new playlist with Boston themed songs and would appreciate any suggestions. I’ve already got Dirty Water by the Standells (from which the title of the post comes), Sweet Caroline by Neil Diamond, Boston by Augustana and then maybe some songs from Aerosmith, Boston, the Mighty Mighty Bosstones. Let me know if you’ve got any other ideas as I’d like to add these to my running mix. Thanks!

Inspiration

One of my favorite t-shirts features this word above a mascot of my favorite band: INSPIRATION. Every once in a while you a struck by it, and in the strangest of places. So here I am, inspired to write. It is not often that you go somewhere as inane as to the movie theater and expect to come out transformed in some way. The film that affected me so was the latest release from Walt Disney Pictures, The Odd Life of Timothy Green.

Going in to the movie, I knew very loosely the premise was centered around family and a couple that couldn’t have children. I won’t delve too much in to the plot of the movie, but it should not come as a surprise to anyone that this is about a void, fulfillment, loss and being a Disney movie, has a happy ending. Part of what struck a chord with anyone who is a parent, or anyone who wants to be one, is the sense of not living to your full potential. This can be in your personal life in not being married or having children, your professional life in not doing what you are destined to do, or in many other facets.

What this film showed me is that although you aren’t quite there yet, maybe you aren’t ready to be. Maybe you need to experience a few more bumps and bruises along the way. You may be feeling like you are pushed beneath the surface, only to later, when you are more prepared, to triumphantly and brilliantly succeed by breaking through. I don’t know, maybe it is just a film that was meant to tell a story and to entertain, but I think this time it was meant to affect each and every one of us that emerged from that theater.

I came out those doors, still drying tears from my face, trying to decide what to do and where to go next in a larger sense. It was one of those moments where I found myself thinking and feeling throughout the whole film. Sure, the subject matter may have resonated with me a little more than others due to some personal ties, but I don’t believe there was anyone who walked out just thinking this was any other afternoon matinee.

To take away nothing from this movie would be an injustice to the story. It inspires you to do your absolute best. Maybe you don’t have a clue what the hell you are doing. You may be thrust into a situation that you couldn’t have even imagined just moments before when you were at one of your deepest and darkest places of sadness and regret. But maybe, just maybe, you come through on the other side molded into a better person than you ever hoped you could have been.

Many have said being a parent is the most important job in the world, and I agree. You shape and mold this little person into who they will one day be. You have ideals and dreams that you want to share with them, but you always want better for them than you ever had for yourself. Becoming a parent means always putting someone else first, and this isn’t a bad thing. I am fortunate to have some amazing friends who are some of the most incredible parents. Some have children of their own and some don’t. Some of us, for one reason or another, are given the privilege of having kids in our lives that look up to us as additional parents, aunts, uncles, foster parents or just role models.

Not only should we all strive to do our best, but we should try to help others do so as well. Try and forget the petty stuff that can bring you down. Look at life through the eyes of a child. Embrace humor, music, sports, art, whatever, as long as it inspires you. Do something that you are passionate about. Seek out the good in people, and don’t be afraid or intimidated. Stand up for what you know is right. Love unconditionally. Communicate. Do good for others whenever you can. Sometimes even children can mold their parents into who they need to be by inspiring them to believe in themselves as much as the child believes in them.

For anyone who hasn’t yet, I implore you to go see this movie. I didn’t find it to be treacly or condescending in its messages. There is a happy ending, I promise you, but you have to get through the rest to get there. If we could all live our lives more like Timothy Green, I think the world would be a better place for it. Also, bring a box of tissues. You’ve been warned.

Wordless Wednesday – 5/23/12

Wordless Wednesday – Una Notte in Italia

Wordless Wednesday – 4/18/12

Easter Through the Years … in pictures

Wordless Wednesday – 4/4/12

Wordless Wednesday – Land of Tomorrow – 2/15/12

Wordless Wednesday – 2/8/12

Dissecting the Fear and How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Ride

“The only thing we have to fear is fear itself.” – FDR

“Do you fear… death? Do you fear that dark abyss? All your deeds laid bare, all your sins punished?” – Davy Jones in POTC: DMC

“What are you afraid of, a fate worse than death?” – Professor Plum “No, just death, isn’t that enough?” – Mrs. Peacock in Clue

So, in case you haven’t guessed it from the title of this post or from the above quotes, this time around we (and by we I mean me, feeling rather royal this evening I suppose) will be focusing on fear. More specifically, I am going to try to analyze fear of rides at Walt Disney World. Let’s start off by saying I really don’t consider myself a chicken in everyday life. If you are to challenge me with a dare, nine times out of ten I am an idiot and will do it for nothing more than bragging rights. Recently I was challenged to eat a scorpion at La Cava del Tequila in Epcot for a shot and the bottle as a souvenir. Again, I’m an idiot, but I did it. Have you?

picture by Kristen Helmstetter

picture by Kristen Helmstetter

picture by Kristen Helmstetter

picture by Kristen Helmstetter

picture by Kristen Helmstetter

This is not an isolated incident of idiocy on my part. I’ve danced on pool tables, laid down in the middle of the road (across lanes, not between them), eaten a variety of things that should never be consumed by humans, gone zip lining, ropes courses across gorges, jumped in the freezing cold waters of the Atlantic in April, gone bodysurfing in hurricanes, etc. You get the idea. I do a lot of stupid stuff that normal, “sane” people wouldn’t. Why is it that I have this crazy hang up about riding certain rides at my favorite place on the planet?

Now I know I’m not the only one who hasn’t done every single ride at WDW. I’ve made excuses: I don’t like getting wet (Kali River Rapids), I don’t want to get sick from the spinning (Primeval Whirl), or I’m claustrophobic (Mission Space and Sum of All Thrills). These are the four attractions across the four parks that I have not yet done. Why not? Until recently, the list was longer.

It wasn’t until I was 26 that I first rode Space Mountain. Truth be told it took me an hour after I worked my way through the queue early one morning before I actually got on the ride. The CMs were so kind. I just stood off to the side of the loading area and they said just let us know when you are ready. I was paralyzed with fear. What could possibly go wrong that would cause me to stand there like a petrified child for an hour before getting on a ride that a five year old can do without thinking twice?

Last year during the infernal D23 scavenger hunt (flashbacks: count the fifth letter of the 23rd word in the sixth paragraph, Osh Popham!, Max Bialystock, order the years of inventions – ack!), I rode Dinosaur for the first time. It was very much one of those spur of the moment decisions. We needed answers for our team and I figured two sets of eyes would be better than one. I think part of what made it easier to get on the ride was the fact it was pretty much a walk on and I was distracted by the task at hand. I was on a mission damn it and I wasn’t going to let my fear of a stupid ride get in my way of potentially winning a cruise (no, I wasn’t really that delusional, but figured it was as good a motivator for trying a new ride as any).

There was also a morning I decided to check in to a certain hotel, the Hollywood Tower Hotel. Friends have been trying to get me to do this forever and a day. I hate elevators, I hate negative Gs, I hate heights and Tower of Terror has them all. So why on Earth would I possibly subject myself to this kind of torture? I think as the list gets shorter it becomes a little easier to force these rides on myself for the sole purpose of completion’s sake. When I attempt to tackle a new ride, I typically will go by myself based on my history of possible borderline panic attacks. I’d rather spare myself the public humiliation in front of my friends and experience this with complete strangers I will never see again. This one was no different. Despite the fact that I knew Shalon was in the park and had been begging me to ride with her for months on end, I snuck on the ride and didn’t tell her. She wasn’t happy that I had done it without her, but now she at least reserves some hope that I will one day take that fateful elevator trip with her by my side. I really enjoyed the incredible theming of the attraction. As far as the ride itself, I am totally fine with it up until the point where it yanks you down faster than the speed of gravity. It didn’t make me feel sick to my stomach, but I made the mistake of not tightening the seatbelt enough the second time I rode and thought I was going to die. Ask Dan Braunstein, I had a death grip on that ride. Lesson learned.

This now brings us to last week and the Yeti. I have now experienced the joy? that is the Disco Yeti. So I did a few new things last week. One was the four parks in one day challenge which I tackled with Doug. It was really nice having company for this undertaking and made it much more enjoyable than if I had been on my own, which was my original plan. The impetus for the four parks was really an excuse for me to force myself to ride Expedition Everest for the first time. The ride itself didn’t hold any appeal for me since I knew it did something I really wasn’t fond of in going backwards (for a whole ten seconds!!!). When Doug learned I had never ridden it before he attempted to bribe me with drinks at Epcot afterwards (spoiler alert, it worked). This was great motivation on a sunny 80 degree day where Epcot was going to be our last park of the day. Doug was very patient and understanding as I told him that there was a very good chance that I would chicken out as we got to the ride. You see what happens is I get very anxious to the point of almost having a panic attack and feeling like I’m going to throw up. I know this isn’t normal, but it is how it works with me. So anyways, he was very kind, again thank you Doug for being great. The other thing is this was not long after we had eaten and I usually attempt to do new rides first thing in the morning before I’ve eaten, when there is a short line so I won’t chicken out, and when I’m alone. This was huge to be overcoming all of these mental and physical stumbling blocks.

So back to the ride. We went in the fastpass queue and were to the point of getting on the ride within five minutes. Once I am on a ride, I’m usually perfectly fine. It is just the complete anxiety and fear of the unknown before I get on the attraction. I’ve even gone so far as to go online and watch the ride video on youtube to count how long it goes backwards (10 whole seconds!!!), checked the length of the ride in time, and done all sorts of other silly things to try to assuage my fears. I know they are irrational, but they are there. We headed up the lift hill and the train stopped at the very top and started to go backwards for like an inch. This scared the living daylights out of me, which immediately prompted me to threaten Doug with the intentionally ironic “if I die on this ride I am going to kill you!” After sitting there for what seemed like five minutes, which was probably more like 30 seconds in actuality, we continued on our journey through the forbidden mountain. I dare say I enjoyed it aside from that stop, up until we started the whole backwards shenanigans. The best way I can think to describe it is that it makes me feel like I’m being tossed around in a washing machine. Unexpectedly, it didn’t make me feel nauseous, but more discombobulated and disoriented than anything else. I think part of this is because you go backwards, up and down and sideways and frontways and slantways, but I digress. So in addition to the unusual stop at the top of the lift hill, we had another one right where the Disco Yeti lives. Inside the mountain, no strobe lights. Couldn’t even see the Yeti since it was dark. I asked Doug if that was the way the ride was supposed to be and he said no. He said I really ought to ride again to be able to experience it the way it was meant to be. And so I did. The second time was much better. No hanging me at the top of the crazy mountain with nothing other than a tiny staircase on the one side. I got to see the Yeti in Disco mode and was much less apprehensive since I knew exactly what I was getting in to. As promised, I was rewarded with libations. I also confessed to Doug that I now felt it would be okay to purchase the fleece Expedition Everest jacket I’ve been eyeing for years but didn’t want to purchase without having experiencing the ride. No flagrant false advertising here.

Now here we are, at the beginning of February, and I find myself with a very short list of four attractions I have yet to conquer. Two are at DAK and two at Epcot. Kali I simply haven’t done because I don’t like spending the day in wet clothes. This is going to be one of those things that just needs to happen when it is hot and at the end of the day before I go to a nearby resort where I’m staying. Primeval Whirl will be something I will do at the very beginning of the day before I eat so I don’t lose my breakfast, lunch or dinner. A spinning coaster just sounds like a recipe for a recreation of the lovely scene in the Exorcist to me, but we shall see. I think next to cross off the list will probably be the Sum of All Thrills since I’ve done something similar, from what I’ve been told, in the Cyber Space Mountain attraction at Disney Quest. I enjoy roller coasters, so that shouldn’t be too bad. I’m just a little apprehensive of the tight quarters, which brings me to the last one on the list: Mission Space. I’ve heard of so many people feeling ill after coming off this attraction. I am claustrophobic and don’t like feeling sick, but what’s the worst that could happen? Okay, don’t answer that.

I think what I need to do is just have a pep talk with myself. I have now ridden Space Mountain dozens of times. I’m still not a fan, especially since it has broken a pair of my beloved Ray Bans and has stolen my car keys (okay, I will take some responsibility since I did put my sunglasses in my shorts pocket and my keys were loose in my jacket pocket, but still!). I ride it with more regularity now. I don’t enjoy the ride itself, but I’m trying to go with the philosophy of embracing the journey with friends. I’m even really looking forward to riding with Tom in a few weeks. I’ve now done Tower of Terror twice, Everest twice and Dinosaur once. I don’t think there are any attractions that I won’t ever ride again (except maybe Stitch just cause it is … well, not the greatest, to put it mildly, oh, and Sounds Dangerous, and, okay, I’ll stop). I’d actually like to try Everest and Tower at night as I imagine they are different ride experiences, similar to how Big Thunder has a totally different (and in my opinion better) feel after dark.

Part of the inspiration for doing this, aside from the bragging rights of having done every current attraction at WDW, was friends telling me I could handle any of the rides I haven’t done after I rode more intense rides at Busch Gardens a few weeks ago. Maybe I just need people to lie to me to get me on rides and then I can kick their asses later if it is awful. So far I haven’t really come off of anything feeling sick other than Star Tours, which sucks since I love it. I know all of these hang ups are able to be overcome with the very simple application of mind over matter. I have faith that I will not die, or get sick, or have a panic attack, or whatever other irrational fears I have. So what if I do get sick? Will it be the first time throwing up in my life? Hell no. Will it be the last? I doubt it. Have I ever gotten sick from a ride? Nope. So why do I think I’m going to? I don’t anymore. I am going to continue to strive to just go with the flow and take things as they come. Does this mean I’m going to do every ride every time? No. However, it does mean that I am going to attempt to love the experience and the time with my friends and stop worrying. What does worrying get you? Nothing worth a damn.

Do you have any rides you have yet to experience due to fear? Which ones? Have you overcome your fears to conquer these rides? How? Please feel free to share.

(edited at 7:05am 2/5/12 with additions thanks to probing questions by Kelly – thanks for the feedback!)